Sunday, March 23, 2008

hearts all over the world tonight

This post is for Giz, for protesting. And for Abby, for being.

I am, quite unashamedly, listening to "With you" by Chris Brown, and it is giving me immense proportions of joy. It also makes me think of Eric(U), which ties in directly with this joy.

I have been thinking about joy. I am struck by the word enjoy and how it essentially means taking joy in something. And then I am stuck by the fact that joy primarily comes from seeing the beauty and goodness of things and people outside myself. With these thoughts, joy doesn't seem so far off.

I spent Easter at my aunts with an aunt, an uncle, a sister, a couple of cousins, and the girlfriend of a cousin. I don't think I'll say much about it, except that at dinner we were discussing a friend whose new wife is a bit controlling. My cousin Adam jumped in to defend their relationship, saying,

"With all due respect, H----- women, present company included, can be quite controlling and forceful themselves."

What could we say, my aunt, my sister, myself?

I lied. I will say more. My aunt and I were talking about the word "feminism" and how so many people see it as this extreme irrational uber-liberal concept that no reasonable woman subscribes to. I'm a feminist. And I think a lot of the men and women who preface statements with "I'm not a feminist but..." are really feminists.

Horror.

Today I really wanted to sing with my little sisters, particularly:

hold my hand all the way
every hour, every day
from here to the great unknown
take my hand, let me stand
where no one stands alone


But tonight, it is just me




and Chris Brown. Hey lil' mama..

3 comments:

Abby said...

- Good, you're back!
- Chris Brown is unashamed goodness.
- You're totally right about the "feminist" comment.
- I think you and Rachel have this wonderful facility for using anecdotes and remembered conversations in your writing; I love that habit and wish I could replicate it more.
- Miss your pretty face, but hopefully I'll get to see it soon

(Got Cummings for Easter and thought of you and how you love his big sensual fish lips.)

Anonymous said...

that censorship seems a little bit pointless.

Unknown said...

habibi: agreed. that song is tacky/wonderful. that email promised is coming; i promise again. guess what? over the past two weeks i have had TWO (that's right. i said it) TWO of those big convos that we had when you were here. the one where you got all overwhelmed and emotional and needed a break. one was with danny and one with dad. coolums right?
love love love,
giz